Yesterday, I had a day off.
Which is not to say that I didn’t have school or work. I didn’t have school or work, but I don’t have school or work on any Mondays these days. Nor Sundays. But that doesn’t mean they’re always days off. I usually write, read, do homework, maybe write some more.
When I say “day off” I mean a mental day off.
Yesterday, I did nothing.
Ok, not true. I wrote one page of a play. I read for an hour. I got my hair cut. And I watched a lot of TV. But for me, none of that really qualifies.
I tried to write more, I really did. I sat in Starbucks for two hours trying to write, but I only got the one page. I went home for a change of pace, and sat around for another hour playing spider solitaire and checking my email. It just wasn’t going to happen.
So I guess when I say I had a day off, I really mean I had an off day. I just couldn’t make myself get anything done.
And for awhile, I beat myself up about it. It was one of the rare opportunities I have to really get a lot accomplished–no plans, and five deadlines coming up fast. Time to work. But nothing, well, worked. Usually getting out of the house helps. Usually a change of scenery helps. Usually a beer helps. Not yesterday.
But I’ve learned that sometimes, that just happens. Sometimes there’s just nothing I can do. Maybe my brain just really needed a break. “No sir,” it said, “you can’t make me think today. Not going to happen. I don’t care what deadlines you have.” My brain can be very stubborn sometimes.
I think these off day days off are good, though. It’s a recharge period. I work a lot, I work hard, I sometimes don’t get more than a couple hours of sleep in a night, and after a few weeks I need a day to just sit back and relax, watch some TV, play some video games, and try not to worry about all the things I have coming up on my schedule.
It would just be nice if said days fit better into my schedule.