Change is pretty constant, but we don’t tend to notice it until the big things happen.
This summer, I was just going along minding my own business, working towards a basic life plan, when bam, I was hit by a change in my life I wasn’t expecting. It was a welcome change, but one that required me to reevaluate a lot of my goals and plans — I tend to have a fairly coherent plan of my future, and sometimes that means it all needs to get rejigged.
Then, a couple weeks later, bam — a project I was working on was postponed, and instead I got a job as a TAD on a TV show. And there went all my time in August and any plan that went with it.
Then bam, and things changed again, and what little time I had was spent reevaluating my life once more. Then the end of the job, a project suddenly reappearing, a job interview, and school starting again.
I’ve never been much of a fan of change. The changes that most seem to affect my life, at least in the long-term, the things that happen that I don’t count on, plan on, have never been all that good. Moving away from friends, or them moving away from me. Sudden upheavals in work or family or life that take readjusting. And usually, things work out, you do readjust and you move on with life. But the transition is never easy.
Even the good change is bittersweet, because you’re always leaving behind something that was part of your life, that was who you are.
But life is change. There’s no avoiding it.
And this time of year, when the leaves start to turn and there’s a crispness in the morning air, change seems that much more present. To our school-conditioned minds, this is the New Year, and that sense brings with it expectations of change.
It’s a brand new start, but that also means it’s an end.
Change is constant, and it tends to work out in the end. But sometimes, I just wish I could have a little stability, a rock to stand on in the shifting landscape.