Living Out

Today is National Coming Out Day. I’ve written about this kind of thing a lot, so I don’t know that I have much more to say, except perhaps a few pieces of advice, after Maureen Johnson sent out a call on Twitter for it.

Coming out isn’t something you do and are done. It’s a process and you will always be doing it, over and over and over. For a long time, every time you do it is hard. Every person you add to your mental list of People Who Know (which you keep track of meticulously — at least, I did) takes effort to tell. Every time I was about to tell someone I could feel my heart racing, even after I had done it a lot.

But eventually it stops becoming an ordeal. And you just start living it. And that process, that long slow sometimes-agonizing process, becomes so worth it.

So here I am, not only living out, but making it part of how I present myself. Just look at the tagline of my blog — Writer, Queer, Geek. And many of the opportunities I’ve been given have been precisely because of that.

Check out my post last year about National Coming Out Day. I also wrote a story in the anthology Speaking Out about life after coming out. Which dovetails with another piece of advice for coming out: read YA books. You can also read about my coming out and how my dad reacted in the Globe and Mail. Or watch my dad in an It Gets Better video.

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